WASTEMAN OF THE WEEK: 060

WASTEMAN OF THE WEEK - NIYKEE HEATON

So for those of you who do not know Nikyee Heaton is one of those super famous Instagram girls who posts photos of her insane body. She does music in her spare time but nobody gives a fuck about that. The reason she is getting thrown in the pit this week is a post she posted earlier this week, and more so being an advocate for an underlying problem.

Nikyee uploads one of her typical photos showing her body off, but with the most genius caption; 

'when i was in high school, the term "thick" was foreign. i was fucked with every day for having curves. i was called fat, and gross, and ugly so consistently that eventually I began to believe it. the journey to self acceptance and self love was a battle i long struggled with. no, i am not petite, or delicate or dainty. but I am fucking strong. inside & out. 5'8" and 150lbs. fuck the mold, we are our own ideals of perfection and beauty.'

Now let's get this straight. These days it's so commonplace to be vain. It's not even noticable anymore we are so amerced in selfie culture. It is what it is, that's where we are, and we have girls like Nikyee, who love to post their half naked photos. Besides the point. The problem is her trying to act like her reason for posting these photos is because she was bullied, and as if she's posting this photo out of some uphill battle she's had to get to the point where she has the confidence to post half naked photos. Who gives a fuck really? We get it, you like attention, people like seeing your arse, just post your fucking photo and dip. No need for the big over the top monologue.

Sure enough it come around to bite her on her arse anyway when people started digging out her pre surgery photos. Turns out she wasn't 'thick' in school, as expected she was just an average white girl. Shock. I've been following her a couple years and even I've seen her body change. She's obviously had loads of surgery, and who fucking cares? She looks good to me. But to lie about being bullied and post some elaborate back story to justify her vanity and attention seeking is soooooo funny, what a dickhead. Desperately trying to add a narrative to her photos to capture the minds of these young girls who look up to her, what a fucking herb.

She's not the first, there's a long line of girls who justify posting their photos with some long, boring, made up, anti body shaming story. The same ones who will harp on about not having to justify posting half naked photos are the same ones justifying them and getting caught out when their lies are see through. Just post your photo and leave, nobody gives a fuck.

NEW PODCAST: - 115 WITH TOM EVANS

During last weeks holiday to Rhodes I sat down with Tom Evans to discuss how Pokemon Go is ruining lives, The Warriors TV series, the Nice attack, The Turkish military coup, religion, holiday tips, brexit and dating.

Also, if you want to come and guest on my podcast send a message to 'Wickedland Blog' on Facebook or tweet me @Wickedlander.

Don't forget you can download all the old episodes here: www.mediafire.com/#osrccod9oedcg

POKEMON GO FEVER

As tasty as this sauce looked I'm not about to try eat anything called chunky sauce without knowing what's in it. I asked the boss man what flavour it was and he said '...chunky.'

Ladies day was a laugh at Leicester races. I'm so unbelievably bad at betting on horses. This guy Gus took a bunch of money off of me that day lol.

Out to all the international sloppers. Daytime drinking crew, overdoing it crew, this next one is for youuuu

When you've got a job interview at Sports Direct

The god Goonism was drawing stickers when he was working at HQ the other day. I popped in and grabbed one. Truly one of the GOATS.

I had my pop up shop at the Echo Factory launch last week. It went so much better than I was expecting, so many came down and bought stuff from me, it was so nice. AND I didn't get any pen on my shirt so that was a bonus.

One of my favourite things is old guys wearing stuff that has a social stigma among young people but being oblivious haha. I saw this guy the other day in the waaaaviest ralphy jacket and he didn't give a shit.

Martin and Sarah got married on Saturday! It was such a nice day filled with faces that I don't get to see too often, booze, dancing and nice food. 

I went to Grace Road with Dan and Brad to go watch the T20. Obviously in the middle of July in England it pissed it down. Why would it not. The game got abandoned. I hate this shit country so much.

The building site near my gaff and opposite sophbeck is a fucking joke. There's this constant pair of stripes of bright fucking orange mud, just incase I wanted to wear clean trainers and cross the road. It gets fucking everywhere, I just can't wait for it to ruin a pair of trainers forever.

Pokemon Go has taken over my life. it's so fucked. it's all i can think about. When I was at the park the other day I saw a guy playing off of two phones. Imagine that.

I've met and spoke to so many random people because of this game, I feel like I'm getting left behind though! Like I cannot keep up with where people are at with it

Some results may vary.

Thanks for reading! Enjoy your weekend.

NEW PODCAST: - 114 WITH CURTIS LATOUCHE, NATALIE GRUBB AND STEPH BROWN

This week I was joined by Curtis Latouche, Natalie Grubb and Steph Brown, post wedding weekend for a very hungover chit chat about police getting shot in America, good TV, bad TV, giving thanks, gambling and El Chapo. Jodie Marsh and much more.

Also, if you want to come and guest on my podcast send a message to 'Wickedland Blog' on Facebook or tweet me @Wickedlander.

Don't forget you can download all the old episodes here: www.mediafire.com/#osrccod9oedcg

WASTEMAN OF THE WEEK: 059

WASTEMAN OF THE WEEK - PEOPLE WHO DO NOT USE THEIR IPHONE DIARIES AS A CALENDAR

At the minute there is so much that is so fucked with the world. It's been a busy year for news and a busy couple of weeks for bad news. Britain is fucked in most ways imaginable, police are still murdering innocent black men in America. There has never been such a rich pool of candidates for Wasteman of the week. I really am spoilt for choice. All that considered I had a thought the other night and wanted to flip Wasteman of the week this week, and consider peoples organisational habits.

So we've all got shit to do. You know when I'm making a plan with someone and they whip out their iphone calendars and look at all the little dots. These are my people. These are the people I want there if it all goes to shit and we need to rebuild. I don't want people who say they're going to do something because that's when things don't get done. I want the people who like to set dates for stuff, and the more time wears on I realise these are the best people to be around.

It obviously goes deeper than an iphone calendar, that is just my preferred method. Anyone who keeps some form of diary and lives by it. If you don't, then sadly, you're this weeks wasteman of the week.

FASTEN YOUR BASTARD SEATBELTS

What's good you lot. Still backlogged but who isn't. You're behind on work you make for yourself and then you die!

As I was leaving a house party the other weekend there was a guy who was at the house party lying on a wall, in a shadow across the road. He was slightly covered by a tree just lounging, listening to his music on his phone. Alone. Now I don't know where to start with how sick this is. He had made the street his living room, and give his vantage point it almost made it feel like as we left the party we were in his personal space. It felt like when your mum comes into your bedroom, and although it's technically not yours, it's yours, and she is intruding. It was incredible, it really got me. I want to start popping up in random areas and chilling in a similar outdoor, covered vantage point. Inspiring.

The international food market was in town again. I love this thing so much, I'm always so impressed with what they bring. I had this spanish chicken dish, it was delicious.

What are these fucking lemons doing? Not only has Leicester got the biggest outdoor fruit and veg market in Europe, but nobody wants to buy your dead food with your dead little union flag bunting. For one day only the international food market is here and we aren't stuck with your english crap. Leave us alone and let the people eat nice food for once. Fascists.

Summer Ball celebrations with a couple of real ones

Imagine being a grown man and getting the number 69 on your football shirt hahaha

The Colonel Parker's tribute from Meatcure is one of the best burgers in Leicester. I've not been disappointed yet. 

There's a new little spot coming to St Martins Square. 'Bodega Cantina.' I had a look at the menu yesterday and it's all like mexican/ tex-mex street food inspired dishes. Looks awesome, I wanna go and try everything as soon as possible.

Do you think they just spin two wheels to generate what goes on these T-shirts? One with the start of a sentence and one with the end? Another T-shirt somewhere reads 'All day long I dream about...Selfies'

Beth Craine shown us a photo from when she had a brain scan because of a fit she had where she had took the time to pop Drake on her head. It made me feel weird and sad that she was so blasé about the whole deal. 

I had fajitas with Olly. I fucking love cooking fajitas because they're so easy to prepare, the actual meal last for ages and you get loads of leftovers.

The next day I backed out the skengman press and made these. I diced the wedges we had and put them in too. They were a work of fucking art and nothing less.

I bought all this chocolate with the best intensions of selling it on and making a profit. The Morrisons up the road closed down and was selling everything 70% off. Newer readers won't know but I worked in retail for years, so I crunched all the numbers and I was ready to ring around my shop keeper friends to see who wanted a bargain. Newer readers will know how disgustingly greedy I am and won't be surprised to learn this chocolate has been sat at mine as I steadily hammer away at it.

This was the scene as the England national football team let the whole country down with a little help from Iceland.

Dan took it well

I saw someone on the TV taking photos of something using their laptop. It's obviously sad when old people die, but ultimately it's going to be an awesome time to live in when this behaviour is a thing of the past.

Thanks for reading! Speak soon mate, nice one.

NEW PODCAST: - 113 WITH BRONTE DAWSON

Bronte Dawson is my guest this week. She has recently come back from visiting her pen pal Nehemiah Chavez, a man imprisoned in Colorado for 128 years for a double attempted murder charge. We discuss how they became pen pals, the letters, their relationship, his crimes, the visit and everything else.

Bronte has also set up a website to showcase and sell Nehemiah's artwork and also use it as a way for people to order custom pieces - www.thebeautifulinside.com. Go and check out The Beautiful Inside on Facebook and Instagram too: www.facebook.com/thebeautifulinsideartwork / instagram: @TheBeautifulInsideArtwork

Also, if you want to come and guest on my podcast send a message to 'Wickedland Blog' on Facebook or tweet me @Wickedlander.

Don't forget you can download all the old episodes here: www.mediafire.com/#osrccod9oedcg

NEW PODCAST: - 112 WITH RHETORICAL REASONS

Friday evening I sat down for a reactionary chat regarding the EU referendum result with Boston WIlliams and a bunch of other guys. This podcast is in association with Rhetorical Reasons, Boston's podcast. Other guests include Eddie Owen, DJ Bobbytron, Dub Pilot and Maniscooler.

Also, if you want to come and guest on my podcast send a message to 'Wickedland Blog' on Facebook or tweet me @Wickedlander.

Don't forget you can download all the old episodes here: www.mediafire.com/#osrccod9oedcg