DEATHS, DAGGERS, DEPARTURES AND DIY

hey, here it is, another weeks worth of things that have been going on. I'm back to uni now, so im busy busy with a lot of projects. for one of them we got to choose what we wanted to do, so i set a brief to "develop wicked-land as a brand" so expect some things to come out of that pretty soon.


i saw this ridiculous bargain in the euro food shop on narbs. 79p for a pillow of these really nice little crisps. they are like tasteless wotsits, but really really nice.



i seen a guy in a sainsbury's jacket go into the co op. i didnt even want to look. i just got out of there before he started shooting up the whole place /nohype



dave and lewis came over on friday night last week for some drinks and some pizza. it was a really brilliant night, just spoke about old booker times and chilled out.



x factor has been at the fore-front of the red-top headlines this week. and like any other reliable source of up to the minute media, wicked-land is at the heart of whats going on.

cherryl cole consoles a weeping cher lloyd on saturday nights show.



will-i-am is piiiisssssed, he wants to get some of that northern-english-crackerbread-pussy, not fuck around hugging gyspie rakes.




Cornelius* tricked john into getting a tropical burger from tj's. it had fucking pineapple on it. looool.


this is me in the back up freezer at work last saturday. there is a pipe that drips, and when it drips all day every day, its freezes instantly in the -25c temperature and forms a long icicle.

i snap that shit off and pose with a dagger of ice. stab people to death then the evidence melts.


in other work news: me and andy found a strange little bug on his shoulder, so we put it in here, like a tomb, to think about what it had done. after a couple hours of solitary, we took him out, pushed him into a plug socket using an extension plug, and switched it on. a tiny buzz and a blue spark shot for a split second and then we couldnt get him out.

as you may have read, this little chappie didnt make the final cut either. there have since been big calls to get her back in, and rumours that its all part of a bigger plan as each judges will select a "wild card contestant" on this saturdays show to go back into the competition. (also it has come out that her mum has been stealing benifits so everyone has to go back to out of britian.)

i left my phone in max's room and when he brought it down to me it was like a parallel universe. he took a picture of me and my world caved in for a couple of seconds.

this guy was jamming in subway using the free wifi dead late at night chatting to people on msn, skype and some webcam ting.

seen bin bag lady from afar too. i would have got closer but i like living. she looks mental now, pure grey/white hair and a really weather-beaten face. she has never been a beauty, but still now she looks fucked.

i tried it at last, the long time recommended by americans; the fluffernutter. peanut butter and fluff on toast. i was pretty impressed, they really really complimented each other. good work usa.

we had free drinks on tuesday night. preeeetttttty gooooood. little vip fridge.

i got the crowd on a wickedland ting for a snap.

darryl got so pissed and started showering down bars over his own mixes. NOT HARD, NOT A BADMAAAAN

the death threat i sent to that racist love-cheat cheryl cole got published in the sun. i told you xfactor had been big news this week. well at least for the sun where real things dont matter.

sam bumped into kyle at the quay.

"ah mate, at last show us your homemade tat then ay mate" said sam.

"ah ay mate, bloody cant get me chuffing jeans up here can i? i bloody heck like" kyle exclaimed.

"oright. lets go under that there canal bridge and you can crack em out there" suggested sam.

"oright." remarked an obliging kyle.

there they are, the world premier.

this is a photo of my last ever thursday night shift at booker. ive got uni till late now on thursdays, so i cant do them anymore. ironically, the next thursday would be 5 years to the day since i started working there.

i was big ballin on my lunch today, two motherfucking pasta pots, living it up. drop in the fucking ocean, and ill eat what the fuck i like, fuck off.

as i took this picture in a nearly empty canteen a massive bloke who looks like that black prisoner out of the green mile looked at me and sort of tutted, doing that things that mum's do meaning "what are you like ay?" i thought fuck off mate, im not before a court of law, so dont judge me beeeetch.

valena also made me a carried dinner today, some pork stew with yorkies and this well nice basmati rice, it was perfect.

im going out now to see p money and logan sama at the su. ill let you know if its shit, thankyou for reading, see you soon!