NEW PODCAST: POINTS AND BAYZE

Yoooo this week we are talking about the storm (or rather the lack of it), BBM, a technological breakthrough, a man with an odd relationship with a goat and a woman who grew a penis due to steroid use. All this week!

CONSUMPTION VIA EVERY SENSE

YOOOOO WHATS GOOD ITS THE BRAUNSTONE BANGER AKA THE INTERNETS INTELLECT AKA THE BLOG GAME PHIL COLLINS AKA KEYBOARD KARATE CHOPPER BACK ABOUT SOME NEW SHIT. ROLL ONE, LIGHT ONE, CRACK ONE, SINK ONE ITS TIME FOR WICKEDLAND BANG BANG BANG BANG

I wish I had the bollocks to always write like that, it's so much more fun pretending to be some fat black guy from the Bronx than it is to be me.

Speaking of pretending to be something, we all went for 'gangsters' at Nandos earlier in the week. It was a jolly old time. One of the best things you can do with napkins is use them as bandannas and whatever.

This fat bloke has took to standing behind the machine at the entry to the car park and helping drivers put their tickets into the machine. He is squashed into some space between the machine and a pillar. Everytime I see him now I imagine he is stuck and it's pure making me laugh. The job is so pointless that I imagine his boss coming round and asking him to do something else and he doesn't dare tell him he is stuck. "I will in a minute gaffer...'

Tesco broke hearts this week when 1 litre bottles of Mountain Dew went back from £1 to £2.19. Bad times. Like anything in this life though we all enjoyed it as much as we could while it lasted and you can't ask for more than that.

We went to Beastwang on Friday. There was a load of us by the end, it was a really good laugh. Jimlad got me a balloon and I've never done one before, it was really funny. I was at the height of hysteria painfully laughing for the best part of a minute and obviously because I'm such a t total square and I never touch drugs or anything like that (aside from booze I suppose) my friends all found it really funny.

Teeps was about, it was his 20th birthday. He told me he was going to stay awake for his entire birthday, I need to ask him how that went. This is him accompanied by a very spiritual Khia.

Beastwang was sick man, it's always such a good night. Its moved to Streetlife and it's a really good venue for it.

FARDAAAARRRRR

I was in London over the weekend. Always fun shit on the tubes. This guy was just reading a fetish magazine (presumably from a sex shop seen as he pulled it out of a black carrier bag) and just started casually reading it. Here he is reading an article about 10 sexy looks. He also read about the best new strippers in Europe and an A-Z of sex. He also read about 24 carrot gold sex toys to which he announced his surprise and amazement to his female partner, sat opposite him. Much to the humour of the carriage.

I was down because I went to see Arctic Monkeys with Ben. They were really great, some amazing moments that ill always remember. When they did I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor I squeezed my eyes shut as tight as possible, bounced around the mosh pit and shouted as loud as I could through out. I was 16 again. They ended with a beautiful rendition of 'I Wanna Be Yours' and had huge confetti cannons fill the air with flickering silver paper like a modern day Crystal Maze.

As I get older I'm really starting to appreciate the London Graffiti scene. It's obviously always been strong but now it seems although it is still writhe, the whole gay street art fad isn't so fashionable anymore and it isn't strangling a real amazing scene of different styles.

I was staying with Jetski. On Sunday me, him, his sister and her friend Sarah went for food at MEAT market in Shoreditch, part of the same chain as MEAT Liquor. My sister Natalie told me about this chain when she went with her boyfriend a little while ago saying it would be right up my street. It was delicious. 

The burgers were messy and packed full of delicious, fresh ingredients, we had this blue cheese dip with the fries and wings we ordered and it was just sensational. When burgers are done well I think they are one of the nicest things you can eat. These were real heavy, thick hand made medium rare treats. Me and Jamie shared a chocolate and peanut butter sundae for desert that was ice cream topped with chocolate sauce, reeces peanut butter cups, marshmallows and roasted peanuts. It was devine.

That's your lot! Thanks for swinging by and having a nose. Enjoy your life

OLD BIRD ON A BEACH

ITS FRIDAY AND IM GOING TO SEE ARCTIC MONKEYS TOMORROW IM SO EXCITED


 

NEW PODCAST: 034 - WINKY MURDER

Just myself and Frank this week as we talk our way through England qualifying for the world cup, the abduction of that blonde girl by the gypsies, Great British nuances, black bears not doing themselves any favours, Kanye again, a female basketballer and a suspicious shoplifter in New York. Enjoy!

FASHION WEAK

Whats good whats good whats good whats good people. Its time for some more Wickedland, so get yourself a hot Ribena and prepare yourself for this shit. LEGGO!

I went to see Jay Z live at the O2 in London with Tom last Saturday. It was amazing, truly a master at work. He plays so many amazing songs and he is so, so good live. He is pure one of like 5 acts I want to see live before I die and it was every bit as good as I thought it would be. We were right down the front, like 5/6 rows back for the whole thing.

He started his show with 'U Dont Know' from the blueprint, definitely in my top 5 favourite Jigga songs. It's so hype and mental me and Tom were losing our minds. That's my shit right there. I found a clip on Youtube of the start when that song drops. The whole standing section roared so loud. I get goosebumps even thinking about that moment haha.

Some people were wearing some amazing shit. Obviously a lot of people were wearing their Jay Z t-shirts. Am I the only one who feels weird about that? I wouldn't wear a bands T-Shirt if I was going to see them, that's just me. Am I getting it wrong?

Look at these DEAD shoes someone was wearing on the tube. They were so, so tight, with double knotted laces. Me and Tom found them really funny, i dont really think this picture does them justice. The laces were so tight the souls were bent and the tongue was rolled over with the label sticking out haha.

It's called fashion in London you wouldn't even get it. Sequinned sleeves with poppy detail on the side of a fur jacket. If you don't get it you're a peasant.  

I went to see Zane Lowe at the O2 last Sunday evening. He was closing our Freshers Festival at work. We've had him booked a couple of times before and the guys in the office all assured me that he was great. I'd been away for the couple of times when we had had him before.

He was astonishing. I've never seen anyone control a crowd like this. He had them in the palm of his hand, and the way he interacted with them was amazing. Me and Brad just stood up on the balcony, front and centre and watched the whole thing, it really was a spectacle. The way he would conduct sing alongs or have them all pogo'ing was incredible. If ever you get the chance to see him do a DJ set, don't miss it. It felt like a concert.

I saw this car parked at Saint Mags when I went to play football the other night. Skenglord shit. Don't overlook the all black union flag on the roof of the whip too, ICE MODE

I was craving a McDonalds like crazy the other night and finally got up to get one. Its only like 3 minutes away from my new place, so chilling. No more long missions when the craving sets in. My winter is literally going to be Mcdonalds and GTA.

Look at this splasher. Just copping BAGS. She was posting in town for a good few hours, it really made me laugh. Bought out half the Primark on a baller thang thang. Ice cold expression on the face, so so normal.

I love living near town. i feel like I'm really starting to see the genius people once again. Anybody in oil slick sunglasses and leathers gets a pass from me. I hope I reach a point in my life where I turn my personal fashion into a parody of comedy and start to wear shit that makes me laugh. I did it for a while a few years ago with those ridiculous animal print Tshirts but when Im old and my wife has left me I want to really go for it.

Whilst I was in town it showered and the sky turned an amazing yellow colour. I've never seen anything like it, it was fully like a filter on the world. Everyone was trying to get pictures of it but it wasn't really showing up.

I worked some more on TP's forthcoming mixtape. I don't know if I mentioned on here but I'm producing a lot of it. We made a couple tunes already including the lead off single which he is making a video for soon. The tune we made yesterday is really chilling. 

That'ts your lot for today, I will have a new podcast up tomorrow. SKENG SKENG SKENG SKENG

IOS HEAVEN!

SAINSBURYS COMMISSION

Remember a little while ago I mentioned I was working on a commission with a local artist called Deborah Bird for the new Sainsburys store opening up in Melton Mowbray? The artwork got approved by the Melton Borough council and the big wigs at Sainsburys, and today it has been unveiled online. It is currently being printed and is due to go up on the outside of the store very soon!

The main image at the top is a composition of a park in the middle of Melton Mowbray, and it is going to be printed at roughly 5 metres x 3 metres. The bottom four represent a journey through Melton, and are going to be printed at 1 metre squared each. I'm very very excited to see them when they are finally done and up!

Click the images to enlarge them!

NEW PODCAST: 033 - FILET-O-FISH

Full team in the studio as we touch on Maddy McCann, Tommy Robinson formally of EDL fame, Banksy, we discuss aliens in depth, exploding toilets and really fast food. All in this weeks podcast!

SNIPCHIT

I spent a day yesterday in my studio at my new place. I think I'm really gonna enjoy being in there, as far as trial runs go it was pretty good!

NOT AT WICKEDLAND

BALLIN AND FALLIN

YOOOOO ITS THE WEEKEND! How cold has it got all of a sudden? It's mental. I spoke to my boss about it and we were saying do you get a super cold winter as a punishment for enjoying a particularly hot summer?

I went to see Westwood on Saturday at the O2. He was sick, he plays so much music. His set was hours long and he keeps such a strong quick pace.

He was bothering us for a photo after his set. Awkward.

I had a baaaad hangover the next day. Obviously I had to have a the special pasta and blast GTA. This pasta was well nice, I cooked it for Will and Darryl but there was loads left over. I got this Lloyd Grossman tomato and basil sauce for it and it was brilliant.

It was the freshers bar crawl last monday, me and Bradley repped it with Sam and Grace. We asked this guy in Fatcats to get a photo for us and he really couldn't work my phone.

It's as simple as just clicking the button. Somehow this guy was taking loads of pictures, and managed to turn the flash off. God knows what he was doing. How can people be alive in this age and not know how to use a phone camera? let alone a camera as simple as the iPhones? It's so so odd. He was clueless, holding it saying 'I don't know what it is doing'

Bradley was enjoying it as ever. We got a bit too excited with the free drinks and I've been feeling the results all week long.

This guy was posted up outside Republic. The struggle is so real you know. His job is to literally stand outside Republic at closing time and hold these signs up, poor bastard. I had a really good night in Republic, I've not been in ages and it was pure fun.

DJ Dazzle. I Think crap hats are a timelessly funny thing. I can't contain how much I love this shit, looking like a div kid getting to meet a celebrity whilst wearing a crap hat kills me every time.

...If I was going to pretend to be any shop it probably wouldn't be a Londis.

There is this little paint chip on the skirting board at the top of the stairs at work and it puuuure looks like a dogs head. I look it every single time I walk those stairs.

My new football socks are so see through. They're just like thick white nylon tights. The quality of this produce is so cheap and shit haha.

The Tesco finest salad box things all come complete with a metal fork. That's so ballerific isn't it? Just eat your salad then throw the metal fork in the bin, fuck it. What does it matter.

This student (I knew because she was wearing a wristband I designed) was waltzing around tesco in her onesie. She kept trying to make eye contact and smirking, like as if she was being so mental and she couldn't believe what she was doing. She was thinking I was looking at her thinking she was mental as well. I wasn't.

The new dominoes box designs are fucking sick. I love this kind of stuff, I'm sure this is by the same artist I posted something of a little while ago. Two colour prints can be so effective.

Dem kind of styles there