Monday, 30 January 2017


So even though I’ve not been posting any Wickedland, I’ve still been snapping away. It’s so weird, I’ve literally been writing this blog as long as camera phones have been a thing and it’s hardwired into me to just snap notable or funny shit I see. My camera roll is a mess. Either way, it means I’ve got some content to post. I’ve discarded the stuff that’s now out of date and just kept in all the regular shite, here it is.

Zoom in on this rack. Pound for pound this might be the best confectionary rack in all of Leicester. This is proudly owned by Choice Supermarket on London Road. We found this when me and Olly were on the hunt for the illusive white Snickers. It was as blinding at the rack that housed it.

Think Mr Nas-a could get in a lot of trouble for this? No point coming up with your own logo when you can just rob somebody elses. Waaaay easier.

Odd one this one. On the one hand I’m thinking a job is a job, and we’d be in a way better place if we had a lot more people like Spiderman here than the dole dossers that make up the general population of our country. On the other hand I like to wind myself up thinking this bloke is choosing to dress like Spiderman because he’s a bit wacky and a bit mental.

Does this photo do justice to just how big this space actually is? Truly incredible parking here.

Yet another unrealistic standard expected of men

This pure tall guy was in the gym and had to come off the treadmill because when he ran his head hit the ceiling hahaha

I’m fascinated by how certain types of people flock to certain places. I guess that’s social science right? When I have my inevitable midlife crisis and look to change career remind me to go back to uni and study social science. Anyway, some new coffee shop opened up a while back on Market Street and it’s pretty fun walking past it most days and seeing the sort of people who go there. I didn’t even know we had hipsters like it in Leicester. They sit outside playing chess desperate to be noticed haha. Well there you go, I’ve put a picture of you lot up on the internet. Hope you’re happy.

Look at Jacks fucking head hahaha. So wide it’s stressing a regular size party hat. He’s got some change spare at the back of his head haha. I don’t know why this photo makes me laugh so much.

Mad the way all vegans look the same isn’t it. I tweeted this picture and someone replied saying ‘cause those involved in the world of grime dress much more diversely’ which on the face of it is a fair comment. But then think about it. Music has influenced subculture and been closely linked with fashion since forever. Diets haven’t. For me, what you eat shouldn’t dictate your sense of self, that’s so bizarre. Who cares? Just get on with the veganing, I don’t understand why you have to conform to a certain look. Is it a nod to other vegans? Like to let them know you’re on the team and in turn reap the rewards? I really don’t know.

I saw this guy and just continued to walk past him. The I thought nah this is too good. This is perfect Wickedland shit. I had to catch him back up and get a photo. Why is he wearing that? What makes him awkward? To be honest, when I stopped and asking him for a photo he was anything but awkward so he’s a fucking liar. His hat should say #LIAR

Is it safe to say with this that quality control on slogan T-shirts is at an all time low? Everyone knows a Dave! Aaaand that’s it. Not a ’Everyone knows a Dave that _____’, that old classic format for Facebook memes. Simply ‘everyone knows a Dave!’ I guess at least they’re broadening their potential customer base with not excluding anyone. I think everyone does know a Dave. It’ll be a best seller.

I wanna know more about this shit. You ever see guys with these doing some shit in the street? I spoke to the guy who was setting it up the day I took this photo and he was pretty closed, he told me he was measuring buildings. His friend had a similar set up about 100 yards down the road. I need closure, what the fuck are you lot up to? Someone who is reading this must know more than I do.

I wanna punch everyone who buys this book. I don’t care if it’s parents buying it for their twat kids, lets punch up the parents then take it to the kids who like this shit. Are you familiar with these dickheads? Ben and Elliot, creators of what is quite possibly the most rancid content on the whole internet now have a book. Detailing Ben’s life and Elliot’s ‘journey.’ What’s more depressing than this book existing is that people will actually buy it. Fucking rubbish.

More literature. I don’t even recall taking this photo. Apparently it was at 01:33am on Christmas Day, so this would have been something I found whilst out on my Christmas Eve pub crawl. I guess this is produced as a humorous secret Santa present. A novelty item. I wonder if anyone bought it this Christmas and made that excuse as they were at the counter in Waterstones when really they were brimming, thinking they’re gonna be getting laid constantly in 2017 haha.

I’ve never thought about this before, a faulty batch of sex toys. Imagine being up town getting your bits on a Saturday and you go past Ann Summers and see this sign, knowing your own little Christmas present to yourself has to go back because of a faulty wire, irrespective of if you’ve used it or not haha. I wonder if they actually had any returns or if it was just a formality.

Here’s the boys

Remember when people won those talent shows and they weren’t on to super stardom? I guess the actual winning of the show was cheapened as soon as Simon Cowell just started signing everyone who came runner up, and loads of them went on to become huge stars. Funnily enough I tweeted this picture and a few Sam Bailey super fans found it and retweeted it, and even followed me, replying to the picture. A brief look at their accounts and they really live it, dates in their bio when Sam has interacted with them on twitter and then tweets to her telling her they’re going to see the show for the third or fourth time. Imagine in 2016 we have access to all the music in the world, and can dedicate our fanship to anyone, and these people really love Sam Bailey. What a time to be alive.

Why the fuck do we need this many lightbulbs? It’s so nuts. They’ve all got so much fucking code on the boxes it’s just a minefield. How are you expected to get the right one when they’ve made it so there’s so many different factors to them? It’s nonsensical. I think we need about 5 lightbulbs.

So remember that new sports bar that opened up on Belvoir Street? For all the wonderful fittings it’s completely shambolic. Heartbreaking because it’s got so much potential to be so good but they’ve hired a team of complete donkeys to work there. It’s almost impressive how dumb these people are. I’ve been there a few times now and every time something has gone wrong. Probably the best was when I waited for 2 hours after ordering a hot dog only to be told ‘the kitchen is closed.’ Cue the manager refunding absolutely everyones food orders.

Another fun venture was when I went to watch Liverpool v Man City on New Years Eve. The biggest fixture in the country over the Christmas period. 2nd plays 3rd in the premier league. Huge game. Instead they had all the TVs set to show Brentford v Norwich. When I asked the lad behind the bar if they were showing the game on one of their many, many TVs he replied ‘It’s kind of just what’s on is on.’ I had to explain to him that all the people who were trickling in weren’t doing so to watch Brentford v Norwich. Fucking moron. Imagine hiring a team of staff who don’t have any interest in sport to work in a sports bar. It’s pains me, this place could have been great.

One day I wanna be that guy who wears fan garments and frequents crap pubs in town in the daytime just so people see them.

It’s good to be back! Thank you for reading and I’ll be back very soon indeed

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