Monday, 30 March 2009

MARKET-HEADS-LAND*

some drawings yooooooooo, most of it is coursework, for this market project we have got. im doing it on market people. also, you have got a full weekly post to check out, just below these drawings, called QUICKED-LAND. safe safe safe

Sunday, 29 March 2009

QUICKED-LAND

ive been doing drawings, and i keep trying to find time to get round to scanning them and sticking em on, and i keep forgetting. hopefully tommorow night ill bang em on. (it is tommorow now.) well looking forward to in a bit, football and bare man should be playing.

i found this on the way work the other day. i was tempted to see wether it was a well good asian porno, or just some bangra shit, but i couldnt be arsed with carrying it round all day. good picture in the metro at work too. friedel's penalty tackle on torres, but it looks pure like torres is drop-kicking him and friedel is like sheilding himself from it. ha ha


been working out with kyle and hof. kyle has got a new tattoo, ask to see it when you see him, safe.

in a pure mist of masculinity, we put on ultimate fighting championship 6 while we were working out. it was pretty good! it was like a knock out thing with 8 fighters and this screenshot from the final makes it look like one is sucking the others dick ha ha. we guessed who was gonna win, and me and logan (hof's brother) got it right. i did a quick youtube for some good UFC videos, and i remembered the brock lesner training one, if you aint seen it, give it a little watch.












caught you on the fade out, you bastard! ronnie o'sullivan on some pub machine at rack and roll. i remember looking at it and finding it well funny for some reason. thats right, it was panic this friday, and i got pretty fucked! so did everyone, it was good man L-R: aaron, kim, eric, beaver, blake and john. about half a second after i took this picture dwayne ran in, and it was like AH MAAAN

thats your boy innit.


i remember getting in, and hugging my dog, and taking bare pictures of him. i bet he just wanted to get to sleep.
poker on saturday night, and i went out first. not playing too well at the minute! i left half way through the match to go to valenas but john swept up so i heard.
dan was on the strongbow, and he was swearing at me too. he had to sit on the sofa, which is shit and below table level.
WASTEKIDS OF THE WEEK - CADBURYS ADVERT LITTLE BITCHS
look at their little twat faces? why do cadburys even need to advertise anyway? they are obviously selling enough. they should have just left it at the gorilla one, and even that got old in about 14 seconds. i bet these two poor little pricks get spotted out in the shopping centre with their mums, and people who's sence of humour is GARLIC BREAD and IM A LADY whip out the camera phones like "go on.. do it, do it! do the eyebrow thing!" there was a beautiful comment on the link to the youtube video of it below, michaelg99864 is a wickedlander. when the little girl gets the balloon out, i want to feed it to her.


yeah safe. hof is here, we are going to do some drawings and that. i said to him "bring some dvds round to watch." he brought 28 weeks later, and braveheart. wow.see you later guys

Tuesday, 24 March 2009

ANIMAL-LAND

alright everyone? how are things?
the sun has been out this week, jade goody died and liverpool are still scoring mad amounts of goals.

thursday night we joined to play poker at georges, i went out first, then jimlad, then george and john battled it out, but george won.

after, loads of us started playing this game where you all get dealt a card, but dont look at it. then you pass your card clockwise, and the person who has your card looks at it. you then take it in turns to guess your card (that is in the other persons hand) and if you guess your card you win. but if you say a card that somebody else has got in there hand then they win! it was pretty fun, we were betting crazy shit... chocolate bars, drawings of eric, pictures of jade goody, small change, chewing gum...the lot. quay joe kept murdering everyone, he was so good at this game, really suggestive with his face. john took home the big winnings though, below.






the sun fucking come out, it was wicked! there were loads of people in a really good mood, and hof was round uni way walking his dog, with aaron. the weather was so nice some of the uni crew got together and he went and sat on the grass to chill and do some homework. when you sit still, and the wind gets you, its a reminder that its not actually july...its march, and it got well cold, well quick. however, i did have this really nice bit of licorice, it was bloody beautiful.

on my way back to mine from valena's sunday morning i was a squirrel boshing some maryland chips out of the bin. YES WILDLIFE.
then, on the same journey there was this cat just full chilling on the train tracks, in the sun. another lovely day it was.
went round johns to watch liverpool spank villa 5-0. poor john, but on the good side of things for him, i took this picture, where i balanced one snake on my face (super daring) and grasped one in my lips. we had a bet on the football, that whoever looses has to buy themselves and the other person a delicious meal from maryland this friday.
we spoke about BRONSON and said when are we going to see it? and we decided tonight. we got to the new cinema in town and it was in the directors lounge, which basically meant that you could pay £3.85 for a beer to drink while you watch it and sit in slightly better chairs, like dickheads, we each shelled out £12 for a ticket. thats just to see a film. on the good side of things, they come in a nice little wallet thing.
its a good job that the film was wicked, the lead actor Tom Hardy was so captivating and watchable, and the film was interesting and proper moody. problem is you came out wanting to shave your head and grown a mustach.

now THIS IS WICKEDLANDING. you can click the picture to make it bigger, and see a clear picture of a naked lady on her knees in the blokes book. i sat behind this guy on the bus, and looked over to see he was reading, and it was something about "new thai house" in leicester. it had the adress, and hthe phone number, it spoke about payment upon entering, what its like inside, and it was a small ticklist of things that it offered. "full body massage, handjob, oral" ect ect. i was like WHAAAAAt then there was another little ticklist for sex, like positions, kinky, anal ect ect and it had who to ask for when you go! it was mad, this bloke was just reading it. when he closed the book to get off the bus, the cover said "a guide to massage parlours in the midlands".


it was so funny how brazen he was about reading it.
i was on my way upto darryls, to record some new boy kid cloud shiit. it went well, we got two new tracks down, and a bunch of ideas too. his mum made us some DEEP NICE lasagne and jacket potatoes, it was wicked. later, darryls recorder started playing up and we were having to hold the microphone jack into the port, and it was still crackling. GAAAY.
i got upto valenas and me, herself and emily sat and played on our psps, it was pretty cool! we put on dogtown and z-boys which i havent seen in ages too, so that was good. i was playing football manager, i won the league 1 title so now im in the championship, but my best player, ben arfa has a big club release clause in his contact and lazio are interested in him, its rubbish. so far so good, and ive nearly passed the transfer window. WASTEMAN OF THE WEEK - CRISS ANGEL.



this guy is one of them illusionists who is pure into his death/black arts/gothic bullshit. im going on an extremely strong recomendation from george and john, and by the looks of things they look to have hit the nail 100% on the head. too many links with industrial music for my liking, and he was actually well bad at what he does, YOU AINT BLAINE! watch some of his videos on youtube and you can almost always figure out a way that he could have done them, also the extras in his shows are such bad actors/actresses it just gives his shit away! "I AM THE MINDFREAK" no, just a freak, fuck off.
i dont know what is more waste... actually being a wasteman, or having a tattoo of a wasteman. both quite bad.

ill be back soon with some drawings, see you then (Y)

Wednesday, 18 March 2009

AUSTIN-LAND

gather wickedlanders...... cometh another installment! not really alot been going off, here it is.

on the good side of things, all my shopping came to 3 pounds and 16 pence, so its austin three sixteen innit? pretty good right? i was bare more happy than you probably should be, and by the way: the cherry smoothie was smooth.


dans dog coco shagging a cushion, proper dirty and up for a laugh she is!

video


saturday night i did another show with darryl, it went well, but we were on at about 11...at sophbeck...so nobody was there, it was a bit embarrasing! still had a laugh though. together we were bringing bare gold jewellery. his mum, in the style of a legend picked us up, she even dropped me off at home. wonderful. sunday after work we didnt play football, so i took alfie for a walk with my mum, he was chilling running about like a madhead, then just looking at me, really meaningfully. he is getting bigger now, i was fighting with him earlier, and he bit me on the hand and it actually hurt!

the pair of you: JUST FUCK OFF NOW

i saw this guy sat in the student union, and he is pure meant for this shit. long greasy hair? check, nintendo t-shirt? check. i bet if he put his shit in to that thing at school that tells you your career it would just be like "BE A STUDENT FOREVER!"i think it was monday night, i rented out a banzai dvd to play with valena. peep out the little yellow sticker, that means only one pound bitchhhh, and one of the best pounds ive spent in very long. it was still every bit as funny as you remember it. i got whooped 12-5. PLACE BETS NOWcharity strip in town and there is a new one; "sense". steer clear of any wasteman-combat-wearing-to-much-time-on-his-hands-div who you see approaching people, then shortly after shouting "YOU GET IT, LIKE "IT MAKES SENSE!""walking back through key earlier, and i saw joe, josh, darryl and beavil kanevil chilling, skating a little bit. it was cool, darryl was very sceptical about football manager, thinking you dont actually do anything.

by the way, i got the sack on it from leicester, and the best team i could get are wycombe wanderers. however im smashing the shit out of it, i got them promoted, and im at the top of league one. ill keep you well and truely in the know.

thats me for now, got work all day tommorow, then im gonna see if i can win again at cards tommorow night. BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG

Saturday, 14 March 2009

DOOR-LAND

WIIIIIICKEEEEEEEEED!!!!!!!! been at work today, chilling out, cool day.


the other night, i tried to put a condom on my head, and it doesnt work now, i dont know if i was doing it wrong, or just that my head isnt the size of a fourteen year old any more.went dans with aaron and brad to watch the football. the balls rolling with mine and dans flat, should be in their the start of next month!this is dave at work singing the booker classics to me on thursday. im working all day thursday from now on, and my job is moving around the stuff on the shelfs to what head office want it to look like.jimlad persuaded me to play poker on thursday night, and just aswell, i fucking only went and won didnt i!? a heroic late battle from rags to riches beating off blake and john in the final, i collected my 25 pounds and chilled out man! ive hardly got any left, and ive not spent it on anything.john is still on lent, but blazzzing!ON BENS ROAD THERE IS: NO NEWShow stink is this? hof said imagine if it was dark and you walked it in, into your house. man...i had to go to the doctors to try and get rid of my death cough yesterday. i got prescribed some new inhalers and some antibiotics, but they wanted like 23 quid for it, i said BUN DAT FOR THE MINUTE, I AINT GOT THE MONEY!!!!!!!

videopopped round to see jims, and actually met his mental dog oscar. goldie is bare reserved. davina mccall was on red nose day, and we were all watching. kyle was having a bare phone call in tjs later. i hate getting served by people who dont speak english. he said what salad do you want mate? i said lettuce, cucumber and sweetcorn... went reeds to get a can of the coldest irn bru in braunstone, came back and the div had only gone and put sweetcorn relish in. i was like whaaaaaat! then when i was explaining that its cool, but its not what i wanted, he was like "yeah, mayo always goes best with chicken burgers." yeah boy! manchester united 1 - 4 liverpool. what you know about taking 6 points off united home and away. the last team to put four past man united at old trafford was QPR in 1992.
WASTEMAN OF THE WEEK - NIHAL FROM RADIO ONE

ben mentioned this one to me a little while back, and we were in instant agreement, the lad is a dickhead! also, he just looks like a prick. he is pure trying to be down with the kids, and young, man is 38. DICKHEAD. his show often comes into my life if amanda, the receptionist at booker is off on a saturday, and his show is just wak. he plays the shittest music, and has this drawn out fake laugh that is just so fucking annoying. gasping for air laugh, over something that is literally not funny at all. radio one presenters (apart from a choice few) are seriously a just waste species. click the video for the fake laugh and that.

video
thats me, playing sophbeck tonight with darryl, see you sometime in the week.