Wednesday, 2 November 2011


Since i started writing this sentence loads of people have died around the world. but also so many little babies have just been born. bare people are crying then.

i really enjoyed this in the news. i like x factor. i like to watch it. i like to enjoy it. if louis walsh wasn't in it then i would be so so happy.

kyle pulled a phenomenal face. a true master of the art.

i went shopping for a birthday card with tazmyn. they are not cheap these days. we spoke about it and that and i reckon its such an outdated action, giving someone a card. irrelevant. effort. costly effort.

i just wish there was a public service message where someone important came out and said 'bollocks to giving cards, nobody has to do it from now on.' and everyone could spend a few more pounds on the presents for the people they actually care about and stop giving a bullshit card to people they don't.

big up the chung dinner natalie cooked for me. deeper buttered chicken curry. i had another portion of it last night. (plate 1)

billy had this wicked photo of kyle on his phone. loooooll

had kamakaze over the other night to put a verse down on a tune for my next mixtape. its gonna be out on new years day and be the most moeshest mixtape ever.

the sun was ramping off the pavement and getting into my eyes and i was riding my bike and forgot my sunglasses. man, was i angry.

and then as if i weren't pissed off enough, when i got to work i really struggled to unlock the door and push it open whilst wheeling my bike inside one handed. some dumb cunt had come and dropped a load of yellow pages off and they were all lodged against the door.

yellow pages and in fact all directory phone books are irrelevant now too. i fucking hate them. everyone spends all day on the internet, and on the internet you will find any number infinitely faster than spending forever flicking through a huge annoying book. even on phones these days its so so easy. burn all yellow pages and make every single cunt that works for them redundant.

i got to work and saw this on the internet and it instantly made everything better.

why don't they make more garments like this? hold tight all the stupid sophbecker, no sock wearing mongols because i know you are all dying to get your hands on this stupid coat.

narborough road looked like las vegas the other night. beautiful. why go to america when you have this on your doorstep?

i remember when i was little i used to sit in the bubble bath, make a beard out of the bubbles and look in the mirror to try and work out if a beard would suit me.

'are we wearing our matching outfits?' 'yeah man, but let's both not notice and do it by accident.'

i hate these dickheads. have a good look at them. when did it become a thing to all wear no socks and roll up your jeans? i can't understand how someone can just instantly adopt whatever the current high street style is.

what you wear says so much about your identity, i would fucking hate to be a personality-less drip who just follows whatever the new thing is. every single one of them aside from converse boy at the front right is wearing either blue, red, black or white vans authentics and now of them are wearing socks, all with pin rolled trousers. did you roll your sleeves up on your t-shirt too lads? oh, yep. you have gone for that one as well.

seen mad women trekking through town with shopping trollies full of weird shit. i like this photograph the way the centre is in focus and the rest is out of focus.

in iceland in town they have attached these massive metal rods to each trolly. it looks so messy and horrific. from a retail point of view, where it is constantly stressed that the branch looks really tidy and neat, they just make it look shit.

apparently they are to stop people stealing trollies. the idea being that the metal rod is higher than the door frame. i tipped our trolly back onto its rear wheels, in doing so tilted the rod and subsequently would have been able to get the trolly out of the door. its not rocket science is it?


max fully got to live out his dream of being turned into a cat. my sister had a house party because halloween is her birthday.

we then went into town. i said to this guy 'what have you come as? a little hippy freak with no aspirations or hopes?' and he replied 'no, i am just wearing a fez.'

remember when playstations were so desirable? every single boy wanted one and they were just some mental unattainable product that you couldn't dream of getting your hands on? they were so valued and if you did manage to get one, then you didn't get anything else for that birthday or christmas. i saw this and felt a bit depressed and upset. it reminded me it was so so long ago when we were at that age and time.

this was very exciting. i love banana flavoured stuff.


I went round to pete from works house on sunday with a few of the other work guys for food. he cooked a smashing roast with beef and chicken, loads of veg and potatoes and that. it was fucking glorious. the gravy was made from slow cooked vegetables. trust me. (plate 2)

it really was so, so nice. i don't usually particularly like roast dinners, but this was something else.
(plates 3 - 6)

look at how nice and perfect the beef was. I've been looking at this photo all week wondering how the fuck vegetarians can live. the girls had loads left over so me and pete smashed the lot. (a sneaky plate 7)

sam dent's yorkshire puddings didn't really do the business so we had to have aunt bessies instead.

sarah and sam had made little cakes. each person got one of their face. i got some fucking yard head thing. cheers guys.

after dinner it was red wine, toblerone and x factor. what a lovely night. define 'night in.'

i would never, under any circumstance queue out the door for a greggs. especially queue about 5 people back out of the door. ever. especially when there is like 5 other ones in town.

relatively mandatory monday fajitas with bradley. they were really nice, we got loads more chicken than last time. for lunch that day i went to the slug and lettuce. (plates 8 & 9)

that night i went for dinner at the slug and lettuce. it was natalies birthday so we went out for dinner. we had a massive feast, it was ruddy brill! (plates 8 - 15)

we got lost trying to find the entrance to the debenhams car park and ended up in the highcross after it was all locked off. hype ting running around going crazy and shouting and that. what good fun.

i got a little tag thing from the police encouraging me to lock my bike up using a D lock. the little tag was attached to my D lock.

frank the cat burglar was busy robbing bikes, dancing and laughing though.

WOWZA! thats a wicked-land and a half!!!!!!!! i hope you enjoyed your read.

tonight i see dave to go cinema. once, i bumped into an old school friend whilst queuing to get food at the cinema while i was with dave. i said hello, she acknowledged dave and i said 'oh yeah, I'm gay now by the way' and she didn't even question it.

thank you and good night.

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