Friday, 28 August 2015

WASTEMAN OF THE WEEK: 021


WASTEMEN OF THE WEEK - ED SHEERAN


I swear I've ran this guy already. He's like top 5 people I dislike. He'd get a bullet. I knoooooow you aren't supposed to dislike him because he seems like a nice person but fuck that. like you've never been annoyed to your core over someone who happened to be a 'nice person'. He's a vile little bloke to look at for a start, the embodiment of why gingers are inherently bullied. I hate his blonde eyelashes and his non existent eyebrows. The whole way he looks from his crap colourful tattoo for the sake of it to his tight beaded choker to his pudgy stupid face.

I hate him.

Then his music. We are all supposed to lose our minds because he has funny songs, but then he has heartfelt songs, and he writes them himself and plays his little guitar! I couldn't give a toss. I hate when he raps in his songs and I've never lost my mind over his singing. There are so many other British singer songwriters to go mad for without making this cunt famous. I see his face everywhere.

I hate him.

Then there is his personal life. It's like it's the truman show or something and someone has accumulated everything I hate and put it into him. He's been sent here to annoy me. Imagine the pure fury I felt when I heard that Nicole Scherzinger was getting porked by him. She's a sap anyway, but I mean seriously come on! She is categorically a specimen. I don't care how fucking charming he is, look at the man. Does she want him to father her kids really???? Then I heard he's flipped it on me and dumped her! I'm the mug.

I hate him.




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